I worked on a surgical floor at one time. So I became accustomed to the familiar trend. No matter what surgery people had, they all had the common progressions I have experienced in the past few days before and after hand surgery.
Day before surgery
Continuous ping pong game of doubts, fears, prayers, peace, unrest, anticipation of healing, dread of something going wrong
Day of surgery
Variation of day before
Putting on brave face when inside “fight, flight or freeze” thoughts continue.
Embarrassed I am a Christian, but still feel such anxiety.
Thinking no one will ever believe I am a nurse.
Sure. You can cut. Take whatever you want.
Doctor, you sure are hot.
Nurse, shall we sing a few rounds of another song?
Where am I?
Who am I?
Who are you?
Night of surgery
Why can’t I feel my hand? Did they take my hand?
I want my feeling back.
I am going back to sleep now.
Post op day 1
It feels like someone stabbed me with a knife.
Give me some of those pills.
I don’t like this dressing. It’s too tight. I want it off now.
Post op day 2
My hand feels better now.
I can fix the dressing. Of course I know what I am doing. I was a surgical nurse!
I can do things with one hand. No problem.
Jay, help me!!! I can’t do this.
Post op day 3
I got this.
This wasn’t too bad.
I think I will get back to doing things now.
Oh … oh … maybe not.
Hand is saying, “Give me a break … well … not literally. Find another way to spend your energy. How about writing a status report. Good thing you are left handed!”
Post op day 4 tomorrow.
Begin hand therapy. To be continued. Looking forward to getting back to playing the piano! 😍