My father used to say, “The young may die, but the old must die.”
He was not being morbid. He was being realistic. The older he got, the more he was living in that reality.
While the thought sometimes brought sadness, it also was a reminder that each day … each moment … was precious.
There would be less time for “do overs” or trying something new. If he did not do something right away, he might never have the chance to do it.
And he was very aware he was making memories, not for himself but for others. He knew he did not have much more time to remember, but he hoped we would remember our time with him when he was gone.
If I am fortunate enough to live on this planet as long as my father did (age 96), I may get to see my grandson enter young adulthood. I hope we will have many memories of our time together that will last him a lifetime.
Age affects what we buy. Trinkets no longer interest me. The house once filled with figurines, is now mostly bare and I love it that way.
Being free of inside distractions, I am drawn to look out the windows to the world beyond my limited house. Perhaps that too is a growth stage in preparation for moving up to my Eternal Home.
I have enjoyed the process of clearing things out, giving things away and thinking of the joy others will get from what were once precious treasures to me. I can’t take them with me (I don’t want to), so why hoard them until I go.
I no longer need to invest in long warranties. When the salesman tells me I can get a roof warranty for 50 years if I pay him more, I decline. I once told a salesman I thought he would be too old to be climbing on roofs by then. I did not address how old I would be.
Age affects what doctors and dentists will do for you. Simply having a 7 instead of a 6 in front of my age changed the conversation from “we need to get that fixed” to “you know things just wear out when you get older.”
I still want to eat, smile … go dancing … and do various things I have not tried yet. Why do I have to go sit in the rocker and wait to die? Fix me if I can be fixed.
I have begun to think more of what I am leaving behind. We had the privilege of going through our parents’ belongings after they were promoted to heaven.
It taught us a lot. We found treasures in unexpected places …. notes, letters, calendars, diaries, things they had saved as mementoes of their lives.
But we also found pain in some places. Letters reflecting family conflicts, griefs, disappointments. We quietly disposed of those.
Those experiences prompted me to begin my own purge. I began to look at old emails, old letters and other things that reminded me of pain in my life. I got rid of them. I no longer needed the reminders and I certainly see no need for anyone else to be burdened with them one day.
As I eliminated the negative, I silently said, “It is over.” I felt so much lighter.
We were so glad all four of our parents had wills, burial plots and had discussed their wishes in advance. Even though we did not want to think of their passing until it happened, when the time came, it was so much easier because we had had those conversations and they had done pre-planning.
So we have current wills, powers of attorney, funeral home and cemetary plans done. Our family thinks we are morbid, but if they survive us, they will thank us one day.
Not only that, we have put together what we call The Survivor Book. Not only have we recorded important information, but we have included what prompted our thinking in making the decisions we made.
Jay and I continue in our adventures of aging. I agree with Jay, who is like Peter Pan. He never thinks about age. He says, “Age is just a number.”
However, having that number does change some things.
Some restaurants give discounts to seniors. My favorite one calls it a discount for “experienced eaters!”😁
Even to your old age and gray hairs, I am He; I am He Who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.
Isaiah 46:4
