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Just Be Nice! Don’t Let It Bother You!
I grew up in a loving family. There were discussions, but minimal heated arguments. Respect was modeled by my parents and expected of everyone in the family.
There was lots of grace and forgiveness for slip ups. When other people were unkind, my parents told me “they did not mean it,” to just “be nice” and “don’t let it bother you.” I tried.
My parents believed they were giving sound advice. In fact, their advice was sound. But I only absorbed part of the message. I somehow believed it was wrong to acknowledge pain. I also believed my being nice was something I could just will to do.
Too Much Pain to Ignore …
When I left home and became a nurse, I was horrified by the awful things that could happen to people. Through witnessing suffering up close and personal, I was exposed to more physical and emotional pain than I could have ever imagined. A painful personal relationship amplified suffering for me.
I learned some people do intend to hurt others. Those who inflict pain act from a place of pain in their own lives, but the pain they pass on to others does not stop their own pain. It only adds to the victim list.
I tried very hard to push through the pain. But most times, when I said, “It’s ok,” it wasn’t. In today’s vernacular, I tried to say, “No problem,” but it was a “big problem.” I hurt, but I kept denying how much I hurt.
Trying to Cover Up The Pain …
When you add one hurt on top of another, it becomes hard to carry them all. And when we try to just cover our hurts, they never heal. When we are hurt again in the same spot, we feel the pain more acutely than ever. Many people who seem to detonate over minor things do so because they are the walking wounded. Everything hurts!
Our flimsy covering of our own wounds never brings healing. Adam and Eve tried to cover their own nakedness and found themselves inadequate to do so. Only their Father God could heal them and cover them completely. Only He can heal and cover us completely.
Scars — Reminders of Healing!
So when we are healed, why do we often have scars? Aren’t they a perpetual reminder of our wounds? Jesus was happy to show His Scars. Why? Was He trying to get sympathy? No! He was showing the reality of His Wounds and the reality of His Healing! He was showing His Connection with all of humanity in being subject to pain and suffering, but also in being an heir to all healing. Healing is ours when we are willing to allow the One Who heals to freely do His Work!
Recently, as I was battling an old hurt, God directed me to a poem I wrote in 2009. The Lord often uses His Words from other seasons of Life to bring comfort and healing in this present season. I felt His Gentle Touch, as He reminded me of the Truth about Band-Aids.
Right now may be the time for you to take off the Band-Aids and show Jesus your wounds. Share with Him how much it hurt when you were wounded. He may tell you it is necessary to drain some of those wounds through forgiveness. But He is The Great Physician Who knows just what to do. Trust Him to heal you!
Band-Aids
I once was so wounded,
But it was ok.
I just got a Band-Aid
And I went on my way.
And then nobody
Could ever, ever see
The pain that I kept
Deep inside of me …
‘cause I covered it with a Band-Aid.
I still was hurting,
But it was ok.
I got a BOX of Band-Aids
And I went on my way.
And then nobody
Could ever, ever see
The pains that I kept
Deep inside of me …
‘cause I covered them with a BOX of Band-Aids.
I still was hurting.
Some said I wasn’t ok.
So I got LOTS of PRETTY COLORED Band-Aids
And I went on my way.
And I thought nobody
Could ever, ever see
Those pains that I kept
Deep inside of me …
‘cause I tried to cover them all with
LOTS of PRETTY COLORED Band-Aids.
One day I met Jesus,
There upon my way.
He said, “How you doing, child?”
And I said I was ok.
He said, “What’s all that stuff
Hanging off of you?”
And I said, “Oh nothing …
So what’s new with You?”
But I had the feeling
That He could really see.
He looked into my soul,
And saw the pain deep inside of me.
He just knew everything,
The stories I hid there …
The things that had happened
That really were not fair.
He knew it all … the hurt …
And all of that pain.
He knew what I had lost
That would never come again.
With tears, I reached up
To put more Band-Aids there.
But He stopped me with a tender look.
He said, “I know … and I care.”
He said, “Take off those rags
And all those Band-Aids too.
I will cover all those wounds.
I’ll do it just for you.
“Come close to Me, My Child.
You’ve got everything to gain.
I know what it’s like to hurt …
But also to be Free of hurt again.
“Let Me tell you the Whole Truth.
Let Me show you now, the Way.
Let Me heal you now and forever.
Let your New Life begin today!”
Suddenly my Band-Aids fell off,
But I really didn’t care.
I was bathed in All His Glory,
As He loved and covered me there.
And now I can truly feel
His Joy inside of me.
It flows out everywhere,
And at last, now I see …
I don’t need any Band-Aids!