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Recently I wrote about giving comfort. Today I would like to address things that can keep us from receiving comfort.
We may want more than what is offered. I have seen people at a large funeral with many people there to offer comfort. And yet they were thinking about the one or two who were not there.
I have fallen victim to this same type of thinking recently. Even in the midst of so receiving so much comfort, I think of the people I have not heard from.
I have to remember satan hates gratitude. He operates best when we start to feel deprived.
So now when I think of those I have not heard from, I use it as a prayer prompt to pray with gratitude for the joy they have brought into my life before now.
Often God has nudged me to think of those I may know about, but have not contacted. Sometimes just a simple text or email that says “I am thinking about you” means a lot.
Sometimes we do not receive comfort because it is not delivered in the way we expect. How people attempt to comfort is unique to their personality. We cannot expect everyone to know or be able to deliver exactly what we need. We need to recognize they make the effort in their own way.
Even if what they offer is not exactly what we think we need, we can be thankful they offered it. They thought of us and wanted to reach out in some way.
The flip side of that is when we attempt to comfort, we should think of what we know about the person and structure what we do around what we believe would be meaningful to that person.
Comfort is not a one size fits all. So really think about the person you are attempting to comfort.
Sometimes we are not comforted because we feel others simply do not understand the intense level of our pain. We feel the gestures of comfort are just putting a bandaid on a deep wound.
The truth is there are some wounds that are too deep for any one person to heal. It will take The Power of God.
It will take repeated applications of comfort from His Messengers. So receive each application of comfort as God’s healing touch and be patient.
Can we ever refuse to be comforted? Unfortunately yes. Sometimes pain is so intense, we want to shut out everything and everyone. We know there is nothing anyone can say or do to make this right. And we do not have the energy to deal with anyone trying.
When we reach that stage, we have lost what we need most to be comforted. We need Hope.
Hope says life will go on, even if it is different from what we thought it would be, even if it is different from what we want it to be.
Hope is being willing to reach up to God with both hands open and let Him pick us up as a little child. Hope says, “I trust You.”
And therein lies the real reason many refuse comfort, even from God. They are angry with Him. They do not know why a Loving, Merciful God would have allowed or caused their pain. Going forward, they are not sure they can trust Him.
The Answer to that is, of course we can trust Him, but we have to come to that conclusion ourselves. How do we get there?
Go back to gratitude. Think of all the times God has mercifully, faithfully provided for you. Think of what He is giving you right now. Thank Him.
Let Him comfort you.
And when you receive comfort, then be, as Paul said,
“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”
Romans 12:12
And then you will be ready to receive the comfort of His Messengers.
And finally, use whatever strength God gives you to comfort others. The comfort you give others will flow back to you as well.
Praise be to The God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, The Father of compassion and The God of all comfort, Who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.
For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.
2 Corinthians 1:3-5
